I reckon it’s more likely that I could take 0 baboons, or if I was unbelievably lucky 1. Given that I was only able to take something like 30 small children in a fight, I have a feeling that this algorithm is being a bit optimistic.

Or maybe it’s just that a giant dildo is a more effective weapon than I assume – though it did seem to work pretty well in Grand Theft Auto San Andreas.

You can find out how many baboons you could take in a fight armed only with a giant dildo at the oatmeal.com. But you already know the whole joke and the punchline, so why would you.